this is what I was going to blog about,

FUCK IT, this is still what I'm going to blog about.

The train yesterday morning was 10 times more crowded than usual, I couldn't breath, there was a middle-aged korean woman's shoulders pressing into my lungs. And her butt was pressed into my right thigh. And she was very clearly pissed at me, clearly thought that I was the one making the subway packed and uncomfortable for her, must have assumed that I wanted my right thigh to be pressing into her butt. She kept wiggling her butt like a baby or a dog who wants more space on the bed, the way they shove their butts right into you.

And what were you doing? Was it because I was a stupid girl or a stupid young girl or a stupid young foreign white girl who wasn't wearing stockings that day? And what were you doing in the security room with the videos? And what are you doing, can't you see that I'm preoccupied, that I don't care if you practice your English by watching Friends in your spare time? In my spare time I wear thin, school appropriate dresses and wait for you to grope me.

You were right, @bird_esque. I didn't go to school today, I couldn't get on the subway. I called Shin-Jung, I told her the truth.

sleep is my way of thinking. Is that wrong?

Fuck, but I'm tired lately. All I ever want to do is take a nap. The weekends are great because I can nap.

I think next on my to-do list is to find someone to force me to do some kind of exercise on a regular basis. To complicate my weekly schedule further and to help me out of this lethargy that I've fallen into.

Other news: Kim Shin-Jung, my official co-teacher, told me today that she felt like a novice teacher because she doesn't know how to make the textbook (which is an improvement from last year's textbook, but still too hard for our students) fun and engaging. (I am so lucky I don't have to use the textbook in my classes. It would be so hard teach material that is too hard for the students in an interesting way.)

Shin-Jung asked me to help her think of ideas to make class interesting. (Why are all my co-teachers always insisting that I know what I am doing and asking me for advice? I'm the novice here, can't you see?)